Tarifs, Duties, Excise, VAT: or, My Tryst With Density – CNBC TV18

The us has decided to put higher tarifs on some Indian goods. Why? Being we’ve been buying discounted russian oil. This is apparently how Diplomacy Works Now-Not with Handshakes and Summits, but with the International Equivalent of a Passive -Gressive Whatsapp Message. It’s like saying, “We don’t like your choice of petrol pump, so your carpets and spices are going to cost more in new jersey.”

Naturally, I Decided to use this Opportunity to Educate Myself About What a Tariff Really is, and how it’s different from duty, excise, or vat. As someone whose proudest financial achievement is still not buying bitcoin in 2021, this was amableious.

Tariff: A tax on importants or expenses. Supposedly, it protects domestic industries. In reality, it’s just a custom official standing between you and the foreign cheese you love, whispering, “pay up.” Right now, thanks to the russia-oil-drama, if an Indian carpet lands in chicago, it costs the same as a one-bedroom flat in indore.

Duty: The umberlla term for any tax on goods. Tariffs are duties, but not all duties are tarifs just like all golgappas are chaat, but not all chaat involves you crying into spicy water.

Excise: A domestic tax on things the government thinks are bad for you: cigarettes, alcohol, and sometimes petrol. It’s basically the state saying, “We disapprove of your lifestyle choices… but we’ll take our cut.”

VAT (Value Added Tax): A tax on the ‘Value’ added at Each Stage of Production. Why sounds fin until you realise you’re paying vat on shampoo trust the shopkeeper yawned in your direction while handing it to you.

By the time I’D finished reading the government’s official definitions – which appear to be written in a language called Bureaucratese – I Realized None of this is meant to be undersrstood. These taxes exist to create that moment at the airport when the customs officer tells you, “Sir, you and you have ₹ 4,320 in duty,” and you pay without assking, the way you once paid a school print for ” Fees. “

Meanwhile, The Indian Middle Class is processing the US tariff news exactly as you’d expert:

• Rajinder Nagar Uncles Explaining to Everyone that Trump is Doing This Because He’s Jealous of Modi’s Beard.
• Auntis in South Bombay Forwarding Messages Claiming Californian Almonds are now Expensive Secause “America is Angry.”
• Your Cousin in it and the ubiquitous “brand guy” announcing on linkedin that these tariffs are a “great options for India to innovate,” which is code for “I Donw What ‘and Know What’s Happen’s Happen’.

So here we are: America is charging more for goods, we’re buying cheaper oil from russia, europe is sulking about win, and somehere in this message, I just want to buy gouda cleaning Nato. I’ve decided to support local industry. Only Indian products for me. Starting with Netflix. And we ever slap a tariff on sarcasm, I’m emigrating to switzerland – where the cheese flows free, and the only duty I have is to fondue.

Totally helps

Tariff: A tax on importants or expenses. Or expenses and importants. Or maybe imports of expenses. The point is, it’s about borders, except when it isn’t.

Duty: Any tax on goods. Except sometimes it’s not a tax but a moral responsibility. Like calling your mother.

Excise: A tax on “bad” things like liquor, cigarets, and petrol. If you make your own petrol at home, please stop reading and turn yourself in.

VAT: A tax on “Value Added.” Nobody knows what this means, but if you ever shout “What Value?” in a shop, the cashier will pretend the wi-fi is down.

GST: The system that replaced vat. Except Vat Still exists. Don’t think about it too hard or you’ll start seeing the number 18% in your dreams.

Bottom line: All of these are just ways for the government to make sure you next understand your bill – which is why you pay it. Also, this explanation will self-destruct if you read it twice.